Dr. Seus?

This looks like something one would find in "Horton Hears a Who", or something. I've seen these plants before but never with stalks that look like trees. These are all over Alcatraz Island but we were told by the tour guides that none of the vegetation is natural and all of it was planted by the prison guard families who lived on the island.

"Alcatraz Island was originally barren of vegetation, soil, and water. The first inhabitants were birds. Through their diet a few grasses were introduced from the mainland. These grasses existed on rain and fog, as there were no natural springs on the island. The vegetation remained sparse until the military arrived in 1848. "

It looks to me like some sort of succulent gone crazy. But, I'm not sure.

Farewell to Alcatraz

I wanted to say a few things about being inside the prison at Alcatraz.

We took the audio tour of the prison, which involved personal headsets and a small recording device that hung around your neck. (You can see these devices on the people outside the prison cell in the above picture.)

This was the most amazing part of the tour. The recording was of extremely good quality and it was done in stereo. When you were wearing the headset it sounded as if guards were walking around on the catwalks above you and you could hear prsioners whistling, playing a banjo or bantering with the guards and other prisoners. The recording had interviews with some of the prisoners that had spent time in the prison. Anecdotes were relayed about the various attempts at prison breaks and uprisings by the prisoners. It was like you had your own personal tour guide. You could stop the recording anytime you wished in order to spend more time looking around. I think the tour lasted about 1 hour (maybe more) but it was so fascinating that I did not pay much attention to the time.

The above photo was taken from inside a solitary confinement cell. I think there were probably 10 of them altogether. The odd thing was that they were probably the most updated and nicest cells in the prison. Several stories were told by prisoners about what they did while spending time in pitch blackness for 3 to 7 days. One guy spent the entire time throwing a coin up in the air, listening to where it landed and then trying to find it. What does one do in total darkness living in a 5 x 10 foot cell for an extended period of time? I certainly have no desire to find out.

Another interesting aspect of prison life is that the prisoners were issued a number and were never referred to by their name by prison authorities while they were on the rock. For that reason, no one knows for sure which cell was occupied by one of the more famous inmates...Al Capone...although, this one (below) was pointed out as the most likely. Obviously no tax payer expense was spared...nothing's too good for Scarface.

I think the hardest thing about being a prisoner on the rock would be the 360 degree views of San Francisco Bay area. That alone would be a huge crime deterrent, I would think. But what do I know? I feel guilty when the CHP is parked in my driveway even though I have never received a moving violation in all my years of driving.

A golden view from the prison exercise yard. (Is that another famous prisoner down there? Why yes, it is in fact Uber-husband...prisoner of love.)

The most famous prisoners: (left to right) George "Machine Gun" Kelly, Kidnapping 1934-1951; Al "Scarface" Capone, Tax Evasion 1934-1939; Robert Stroud "Birdman of Alcatraz" 1942-1959; Meyer "Mickey" Cohen, Racketeering 1961-1962; Alvin "Creepy" Karpis, Kidnapping Bank Robbery 1936-1962; Arthur "Doc" Barker, Kidnapping 11935-1939

Nerd Boy relieved to be steaming back to San Francisco from Alcatraz.

Poop deck welcoming committee. Ho hum...another beautiful day on the Bay.

Alcatraz Welcomes Indians

In 1963 Alcatraz closed as a federal penitentiary. It had fallen into serious disrepair and so the prisoners were moved. In 1964 it was declared federal surplus land.

In 1969, a group of Indian activists took over the island.

"The takeover of Alcatraz was one of the most successful American Indian protest actions of the 20th century, fueling the rise of modern Native American activism. In fact, many of the 74 Indian occupations of federal facilities that followed Alcatraz were either planned by or included people who had been involved in seizing the island. The occupation also brought Indian rights issues to the attention of the federal government and American public, changing forever the way Native people viewed themselves, their culture and their inherent right to self-determination."

I was not living in San Francisco at the time...I moved to the city in 1976...but I do remember this event happening as it was all over the local news (I was living up here in Gold Country.) I do not remember why the Indians took over the island because I was really too young to care too much about it. The tour at Alcatraz does not give much more information. I know that the leader of this movement's child died on the island due to a fall. When he left the island the movement apparently fell apart from lack of leadership. My research indicated that the Indians moved into the Warden's house when they occupied the island. At some point a fire swept through the warden's house and other living quarters and lighthouse. The cause of the fire is under dispute and the tour does not mention how the fire occurred. Some people claim it was accidental, some people claim that the Indians started it and some people claim that a group of white men snuck onto the island and started it.

In any event, the takeover only lasted three years. Electricity and water failed on the island and so the Indians left. However, apparently this event caused a renewed interest in Indian rights within our government.

"On July 8, 1970, President Nixon announced a new policy of "self-determination without termination" for Native Americans. "It is long past time that the Indian policies of the federal government began to recognize and build upon the capacities of the Indian people," he said. The government again decided not to remove the remaining occupiers."

Alcatraz...which began as a military base in 1850, became one of the most notorious prisons in the United States, lit the fire of an Indian Rights movement...now peacefully continues as a wonderful National treasure which is well-worth the trip.

Fisherman's Wharf

Bird's eye view of Fisherman's Wharf looking towards Pier 39.

And you thought aligators were only in Florida?

After that nasty affair with the screaming mime (see post below and I have to say that I feel like posting her picture for all who go to Fisherman's Wharf in SF to be aware of but there are more pleasant things to post) we wandered down Fisherman's Wharf to Boudini Bread Company, where we had lunch. We spied this gentlemen in the huge window of the bread company. He was baking bread in the shapes of turtles, crab and this big fella. He also had a speaker device that allowed him to speak to the people on the street. He held up the alligator for me to take a picture...and I didn't have to pay him anything.

Speeding away from The City towards The Rock. Main landmarks: Coit Tower, The Pyramid and the tallest building which used to be called The Bank of American Building (this was the building used in the Towering Inferno), but I don't know what it is called now. There is a restaurant at the top that moves around like a turntable so that when you are eating you eventually get a view of the entire city...360 degrees.

Finally, turning towards Alcatraz, we were greeted with this warning:

WARNING: PERSONS PROCURING OR CONCEALING ESCAPE OF PRISONERS ARE SUBJECT TO PROSECUTION AND IMPRISONMENT.

Nerd Boy looked at me with a "what's all this about prisoners?" look on his face. I assured him that, to my knowledge, there were no prisoners left on the island and that the sign was probably just an historical remembrance. He didn't look convinced.

This photo also shows a view of the lighthouse (first one built in California) and the burned out warden's dwelling, with the actual prison directly behing the lighthouse. The warden's dwelling, living quarters of the guardsand their families and the lighthouse were all burned in the 1970's when the Indians took over the island. (At the point the prison had been closed for 10 years.)

Anyone remember that?

More about that tomorrow.

It's a mime field out there.

The Golden Gate Bridge...a freedom view from a ferry bound for Alcatraz.

The City...A view of freedom from inside Alcatraz.

Yesterday I mentioned that the Hick Family went on a field trip. We were fulfilling a history assignment for my daughter's American History Class. Her assignment was to visit one historical site in Northern California. Some of her choices were Sutter's Fort, Gold Discovery Site in Coloma, Crocker Art Gallery in Sacramento, an Indian museum, a gold mine, the Presidio in San Francisco and Coit Tower in San Francisco. We have all been to all of these places except maybe my children have never visited the Presidio. The most interesting suggestion was Alcatraz in the middle of the San Francisco Bay. None of us have ever been there, so that is what we chose.

I'm not a big fan of my tax dollars being spent on frivolous and useless things. For the most part I think that the private sector can handle most enterprises more efficiently than the public sector (reference UPS compared to the US Post Office...no offense to any postal workers...my postal worker is wonderful; there is just too much bureaucracy for efficiency.)

However, the Alcatraz Island Tour was worth every penny that the taxpayers paid. We boarded the ferry at Fisherman's Wharf (I think it cost about $16.00 per person for the tour and ferry ride) and the ride took about 10 minutes. It was a glorious day on the Bay and I was reminded that I had not been sailing on the Bay for many years.

Prior to boarding the ferry we ate lunch at the wharf and walked around observing all the street theater. We ate clam chowder and crab salad (and Nerd Boy ate pizza (?)).

I have a small confession to make...someone in my family apparently committed a faux pas when he/she took a picture of a street mime and did not put some money in her box which had a sign that said something like "Put some money in the box to make me come alive." There were many people standing around observing this particular mime who was dressed all in white and had white makeup on. I guess she was trying to look like a porcelain doll. Anyway, this rude person in my family took a picture from several yards away. Then, he/she sauntered on past the "mime" without putting some coins in the box. Nothing happened for a few seconds and then the "mime" started screaming, "Hey! It's customary to pay for any photos you take." I didn't realize the screaming was directed at the insensitive/tightwad/miserly person in our family who had taken the offending picture until the "mime" screamed again. "Hey, lady! You should pay for that photo." Now the offending person was too embarrassed to turn around and walk all the way back to the screaming mime to put some money in the box with all those tourists watching her shameful behavior.

Besides...what's the deal with a talking mime anyway? There's something definitely wrong with that.

The guilty picture-stealing-person decided to go back later when the hub-bub had calmed down and sneak some money into the box. Guilt is a tough task master.

I'll post some more tomorrow.

"Is this the line for the Alcatraz Ferry?"

A Rocky Adventure

Has Hick finally had it with her children's antics and attitudes?

Is she sick of their tired old excuses as to why they will not empty the dishwasher or clean their rooms?

Has she finally gone "off the deep end" and sent them to The Rock as punishment?

OR

Is this another Hick family high adventure?

Stay tuned for more of Hick's weekend.

Same Hick channel...

Same Hick station...

(Apologies to Batman.)

Excuses, excuses

We all use excuses. Some of them are good. Some of them are creative. Some of them are true. Some of them are just bad and ought not to see the light of day. Excuses give us time to think. Excuses are a way of apologizing. People expect excuses. Excuses make for a more civilized society. Instead of saying such things as, “I had more important things to do,” or, “I didn’t feel like doing it”, or, “I wish you wouldn’t bother me with such trivialities” you can bring out a worn-out old excuse which mollifies the questioner.

The Hick house is probably no different than any other home when it comes to excuses. I wish we were more creative, because that would give me more to write about. But, these are some of the excuses most families are familiar with.

“I forgot” is a standard excuse at the Hick House. This excuse can be used for every situation. I don’t really believe that the people in my family are quite as memory deficient as they would like me to believe. But they have reminded me that dementia runs in my family and so it would probably be my fault if they forget so many things…having my genes and all.

“It’s not my turn.” I like this one because it’s diabolically clever. When I ask the nearest child if they would please empty the dishwasher, he immediately pronounces that it is not his turn because he did it last time. I call to the next child who says no, she did it last time. “Don’t you remember, Mom? You were standing right here talking on the phone when I did it.” First child says, “Nah uh, I did it last when you were out with your friends.” By the time the discussion becomes full blown, I have forgotten what I’ve asked the children to do. Maybe I should rethink the “I forgot” excuse.

“I don’t know.” Another all-purpose excuse, although it doesn’t always make sense when it is used. For example if I ask one of the children: “Didn’t you see the cat throw-up here in the middle of the floor? You’ve been watching tv in here all day. Surely you must have seen it, or at the very least heard the cat gagging?” Or “Can’t you remember to put your dishes into the dishwasher? It’s not like I don’t ask you to do it everyday.” Although “I don’t know” doesn’t really work in these situations, it gets the offending person off the hook. It does work for the Mom-asked-a-dumb-question-and-I-don’t-want-to-tell-her-its-a-dumb-question-because-she-may-not-see-the-humor-in-the-situation type of question such as, “How many days in a row are you going to wear those same dirty socks?” Or, “Do you think your father is made of money?” And it always works for the ever popular “Why did you do that?”

“My dog ate my homework.” This excuse was originally creative, but is now trite and a true eye-roller. Pity the poor scholar whose dog really did eat his homework. My children have never used this excuse, although my oldest has come close.

“I didn’t have any clean clothes.” Now this excuse was surprising to me. It was used by one of the young workers who is working on my remodeling project. He didn’t show up one day to work. The next day he offered the above excuse. I looked at what he was wearing, which was a pair of drywall-mud-spattered overalls and a t-shirt. I noticed that he was applying more dry-wall mud to my walls. It didn’t seem to me that the job required clean clothes, but what do I know?

I’m just glad I’m not his mother.

The Chronicles of Grocerystoria

(With apologies to C.S. Lewis)

I have written about grocery store shopping before (here and here), so I feel I can claim a series.

Today my subject is: grocery cart inspections.

I suppose we are all subject to looking into someone’s grocery cart to get a glimpse of his or her life. Sometimes you see a mother with two kids jumping around and one baby in the cart. The mother looks harried (we mothers know how she feels) and she just wants to get what she needs and get out. So, when we glance into her cart and see that she has purchased individually wrapped snack foods and quick-fix dinner boxed goods we react in one of two ways:

1. We look aghast at the horrible nutritional choices she has made for her family. She has probably doomed them to a life of obesity to say nothing about the fact that they will never experience a true “home-cooked” meal. We cluck our tongues and look sadly at the future little fatties. The environmentalists and economists amongst us also grimace at all the packaging used in the ‘individually wrapped” snacks. Couldn’t she just go to Costco and buy the super-duper-jumbo size graham crackers and package them in reusable environmentally safe but cheap containers?

OR:

2. We smile at her sympathetically knowing that she will be able to spend more time with those precious children because she is not slaving over a hot stove. She is also not wasting money by throwing away stale food that couldn’t be used because she couldn’t find environmentally safe, but cheap reusable containers in which to store the jumbo food items. We wish we would have done that when our kids were young, but now they are grown and not around too much at dinnertime.

The other day, I saw a father dashing from aisle to aisle while his teenage daughter heroically struggled to follow him. She was trying to push a shopping cart loaded with two 50-pound bags of dog food. I glanced at the father’s t-shirt because there was half of a dollar bill fluttering out of the middle of the shirt. I mistakenly read his shirt to see why there was a dollar bill coming out of the middle of his shirt and I read the following:

“My kids think I can pull money out of my butt”. Those words accompany a picture of a man’s bare butt with the aforementioned dollar bill sticking out of it.

I looked back at the young teenage girl as she was wrestling to turn the cart around in the middle of the soft drink aisle because her father had made an abrupt turn-about after he threw a 24 pack of Mountain Dew in the cart. I smiled at her and she smiled back looking very embarrassed…big dogs and teenage boys, I thought…at the same moment “what a jerk” passed through my mind.

I have made other grocery cart judgments while standing in line behind a group of young men with frozen pizzas, beer and beef sticks. I generally make a note to myself to invite my oldest son and his friends up for dinner because he is struggling to live on his own and does not always eat a good meal. But, I am not always so generous in my grocery cart judgments of people.

Yesterday it was my turn to be scrutinized.

I was at the end of my shopping and my cart was packed. My daughter had gone off to find some tea. My youngest son had just been given permission to get us some sodas “for the long trip home.” As he plopped a Mountain Dew and Diet Black Cherry Vanilla Coke into the cart, a friend came up behind me to say hello.

At the time I did not realize he was part of the Grocery Cart Police.

He immediately commented on my very full cart. He helpfully suggested that I should shop at Costco or get a bigger cart. He commented about how his wife knows exactly what stores to visit in order to get the best deals…Safeway, Costco, Trader Joes, Food 4 Less, etc. She knew the best places and the best prices should I ever want to know. I smiled while thinking that driving another 30-40 miles out of my way would probably not save me much money.

He then spotted the two sodas on the top of my heaping cart. He pointed his finger at them and said, “Don’t you know those are bad for you?”

Me: Well, uh…

Grocery Cart Policeman: Do you know how many calories are in those things? (He plucked up the Diet Black Cherry Vanilla Coke and twirled it around until he could view the “Nutrition Facts” on the back of the bottle.)

Me: None?

GCP: (Peering at the Facts and quickly putting the Diet Coke back in the cart and snatching up the Mountain Dew.) Aha! 240 calories!! This stuff is very bad for you. Didn’t you know that?

Me: Yes, I’m well aware, but… (I didn’t mention that my daughter’s doctor had recommended that she drink full-sugar soda in order to get more calories into her. She, however, won’t touch it because she has bought into the bad food/good food dogma.)

GCP: I should let my son talk to you. He would tell you how bad all this stuff is.

Me: Sometimes I give my kids a treat and…

He stopped listening while he peered more deeply into my cart. He looked at me with the same kind of sympathetic look that I used when I saw the teenage girl and her dollar-bill father. I was ashamed of myself.

Me: Ya know, sometimes you buy things that may not seem to be the healthiest thing, but you know your kids will eat it. My daughter was diagnosed anorexic and so I’m trying to find things that she will eat and those foods may not be the healthiest things but they have calories and…

GCP: Anorexia? Bah…that’s just a name they use. (He shook his head and waved his hand in dismissal as he continued to pry through my cart with his eyes.) Well…gotta go get some cookies. Nice talking to you.

Me:…?

Note to self: Maybe I should shop late at night.

Never Forget

Todd Beamer...One of the Heros of Flight 93

"We do know the final thoughts and words of Todd Beamer, a 32-year-old Oracle Corporation account manager from Cranbury, N.J., with a wife and two young sons (and a third child on the way), who was travelling to California for a September 11 business meeting on Flight 93. Somehow, Beamer's cell phone call from Flight 93 was routed to Lisa Jefferson, a supervisor with the GTE Customer Center in Oakbrook, Illinois. As Mrs. Jefferson proceeded down the checklist in GTE's "distress call" manual, Beamer relayed the details of their situation: number of passengers, number of hijackers, weapons carried by the hijackers, etc. As reported in Newsweek's "The Real Story of Flight 93," Beamer's last words to Lisa Jefferson included a recitation of the Lord's Prayer:

Up to this moment, Beamer had been all business. "Lisa," he said suddenly. "Yes?" responded Jefferson. "That's my wife," said Beamer. "Well that's my name, too, Todd," said Jefferson. "Oh, my God," said Beamer. "I don't think we're going to get out of this thing. I'm going to have to go out on faith." Jefferson tried to comfort him. "Todd," she said, "you don't know that." Beamer asked her to promise to call his wife if he didn't make it home. He told her about his little boys and the new baby on the way. Then he said that the passengers were going to try to jump the hijackers. "Are you sure that's what you want to do, Todd?" asked Jefferson. "It's what we have to do," he answered. He asked her to pray with him. Beamer kept a Lord's Prayer bookmark in his Tom Clancy novel, but he didn't need any prompting. He began to recite the litany, and she joined him:

Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed by thy name Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread. And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil: For thine is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, for ever. Amen.

"Jesus help me," Beamer said. He recited the 23d Psalm. Then Jefferson heard him say:

"Are you guys ready? Let's roll."

http://www.snopes.com/rumors/beamer.htm

How to Live in Chaos and maintain...

...a personality disorder.

We have entered month two in the Reconstruction of the Hick House.

As I look back, it seemed like the whole thing started off simply enough when I was trying to make sense of the small dining room just off the entry. It was really too small to be a dining room, although it looked swell when someone walked in the door.

I guess I should say it was too small to be a dining room where real people could actually sit and eat together. We discovered that the best way to utilize the room was to eat in shifts, which defeated the whole idea of eating together.

So, one day early this year I had the bright idea of removing the wall between the dining room and kitchen/family room area. As it turned out, the wall was a load-bearing wall, but that did not stop me. Once the idea hit my beady little brain, I had to do it.

A deal was struck with a local contractor and, VOILA…

Well, we have not actually hit “VOILA”, yet.

In fact…if truth were known, “VOILA” appears to be a mirage that is only dimly seen when the dust briefly settles at the end of the day.

As an aside: Do I have Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder? And, if true why would I tackle such a task? And why, in Heavens name, would I agree to remodel the kitchen at the same time? (Not my idea. It was my ADHD infected husband, who is also redecorating my daughter’s room, the guest room and my youngest son’s room at the same time.) My friends tell me that I am a bit obsessive and anal…does that make me OCD? We’ll never know because I am too busy trying to clean up dust and nails and spider webs and drywall and insulation and laying awake at night going over each little detail of the kitchen and (I could go on, but I won’t) to go to another doctor to be told something that I already suspect.

The important thing is living through the construction. I found out early on that hiding in my bedroom with the door closed does not work. For one thing, there is a bunch of stuff being stored in the bedroom so there is not enough room for me and my dog unless we are both lying on the bed and who wants to lie around on the bed all day? And I don’t even want to talk about trying to keep the bed cleared off from stuff that “needs to be stored somewhere and the bed is an obvious large flat storage place”. (See my posts on Flat Space Storage Systems that my family utilizes.) Besides, trying to homeschool Nerd Boy when I’m behind my bedroom door and he is trying to ask me about a math problem from the other side of the door is not working out very well. He hates having to slide his paper under the door only to have me slide it back with a hastily scribbled "try again".

So…here is the Hick coping method of living with construction and remodeling, homeschooling a 13 year old, caring for an elderly father who lives 40 minutes from my house and dealing with a member of the family who has an eating disorder and needs to be taken to a clinic 65 miles away three times per week…

Go to Tahoe for the weekend!

I love avoidance therapy.

Note from the Management: Below is a photo of Hick's Retreat nestled right in the middle of the chaos. Note that she has included a comfy chair, a fan and a foot rest which doubles as a laptop holder/magazine hider. She has a pleasant view of her backyard forest. She is also looking ahead to winter as she has located her retreat next to the stove. Also note that the imaginary kitchen island (blue tape) is still on the floor which helps to remind her that she will eventually have a kitchen. Although she is not presently sitting in her comfy Retreat, we are hopeful that she will eventually return from Tahoe and be able to use this little oasis.